I heard this on NPR this morning: University of Wisconsin professor Sue Fondrie won the Bulwer-Lytton Contest, which asks people to come up with terrible first lines to imaginary novels. Foudrie's winning entry works in dead sparrows and forgotten memories. The contest honors British writer Edward George Bulwer-Lytton, who opened his novel with the immortal words: "It was a dark and stormy night."
http://www.npr.org/2011/07/26/138697098/wisconsin-professor-wins-bad-writing-contest